


Oh What A Feline

by MapleleafCameo



Category: Check Please! (Webcomic)
Genre: Alternate Universe, And Cat Hair, Anxiety, Bad cat puns, Bitty is a Little Shit, Confused Jack, Confused? Read the Story, Eric Not so Much, I'm Sure There's Other Tags But Who Knows, M/M, Magical Realism, SO MUCH FLUFF, Sex, Were-Creatures
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-27
Updated: 2018-01-28
Packaged: 2019-03-10 04:32:41
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 7,518
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13495028
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MapleleafCameo/pseuds/MapleleafCameo
Summary: Shitty convinces Jack they need a cat.Jack is dubious.Bitty is a little shit. As most cats are.And he's not all he seems.





	1. You've Cat to be Kitten Me

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Callie4180](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Callie4180/gifts).



> For the wonderful, awesome, lovely BakerStMel/Callie4180  
> And there's a cat...because.  
> Thank you mattsloved1 for looking through this and not minding(too much) that it went form a one shot to 3 chapters.  
> Chapter 1 is ready to go, Chapter 2 will be up later today & hopefully chapter 3 will be up tomorrow.
> 
> Characters belong to the amazing Ngozi.

“But Jacques, my beloved Hockey God, look at him! Look at how adorable this little guy is. How can you resist those big brown eyes and cute pink nose? Oh my fucking God, he’s purring!”

 

“Shits, we are not getting a cat.”

 

Shitty held the little ginger towards Jack. The cat tilted his head up and rubbed his face on Shitty’s hand. Shitty pleaded silently, making his lip quiver. “What if no one adopts him? What if this poor little fucker gets shipped back to the shelter and they put him to sleep? What if…”

 

“It's a no-kill shelter. Someone will adopt him.” Jack hesitated not wanting to give Shitty any leverage whatsoever. “He’s a very pretty cat. I wouldn't worry too much.”

 

He knew it had been a mistake because as soon as the words left his mouth, Shitty’s whole face lit up.

 

“You think he’s pretty! My bro!”

 

Everyone on campus heard Jack’s eye-rolling.

 

The woman running the Adopt-a-Pet booth at the Samwell orientation fair leaned over and said, “You know, he’s right. If you want that cat, I’d take him now. He’s a real sweetheart. Such a sunny personality. He’ll be gone before the day is out.”

 

“See? I think it would be good for the Haus. Think of coming home after a hard day at the rink and having this little fellow jump on your lap or giving you little kitty cat kisses on your handsome nose. Or snuggling with him while studying for an exam! Therapy, Jack! Therapy!”

 

“Cats have been known to reduce anxiety and high blood pressure,” the woman interjected.

 

“You’re not helping,” muttered Jack. “But what about when we’re away? Who’s going to look after him?”

 

The woman said, “They’re fairly self-sufficient, and if given enough food and water they can be left alone for a couple of days.”

 

“I’m sure we can get someone to check on the little fellow. Please, Jack! Please, please, please…”

 

“Fine, but you need to go clear it with Johnson, Rans, and Holster. They share the Haus, too.”

 

“Excellent. Can you stay here and keep an eye on him? Make sure no one takes him?” He thrust the cat into Jack’s arms. The little cat squirmed a bit, and Jack sneezed. The woman at the booth smothered a laugh. Jack glared.

 

“Here, you can give him back to me. I promise I won’t let anyone take him until your friend comes back.”

 

Jack handed her the cat. He futilely brushed at the fine ginger hairs that clung to his shirt.

 

About half an hour later, Shitty ran up to the booth and skidded to a halt in front of Jack. “Everyone agreed. Rans and Holster can't wait to meet him.”

 

“What about Johnson?”

 

“Yeah, well, you know Johnson. He said, and I quote, ‘What an unusual way to introduce the protagonist but if the creator decides a magical AU is the way to proceed with this fanfiction who am I to argue?’”

 

“Does that mean yes?”

 

Shitty shrugged. “I guess so since he also said he’d buy the litter box.”

“Just keep him out of my room, please. Pretty sure I’m allergic.” Jack sneezed again.

 

The woman had Shitty sign some forms, and Jack paid for the cat on the understanding the others would chip in. They were given his adoption forms and certificates to show his shots were up-to-date as well as a small bag of food to get them started. She gave them a pamphlet of instructions and told them where they could find a local vet. She placed him in a cardboard pet carrier and handed it to Shitty.

 

“And here, I’m going to throw this in, too.” She gave Jack a small, toy bunny. “He really loves it. Sleeps curled up with it every night.”

 

Shitty asked, “Does he have a name?”

 

“Well,” the woman laughed. “No, no name. When he showed up at the shelter, he’d been dropped off on the doorstep in a box. There was a note inside that said, ‘Please find me someone to love.’ You can name him whatever you want. He’s your cat now.”

 

Shitty held up the box and peeked into one of the holes on the side. A small paw came out and batted him on the nose. “I’m going to call him Bitty. Because he’s an itty, bitty kitty, yes he is! He really is. He’s the cutest, he…”

 

“Shitty, you can stop now.”

 

(^..^)/

 

They spent a lot of money at Petco. Bitty slept in the box the cat bed came in.

 

(^..^)/

 

Jack woke up warm and comfortable. He’d had probably one of the best night sleeps he’d had in quite a while. He blinked at the bright light shining into his room.

 

And sneezed.

 

And again.

 

Third time’s the charm.

 

“What the…Shitty!” On his pillow by his head, Bitty lay curled up in a perfect little cinnamon roll, tail tucked around, toy rabbit underneath. At the yell for Shitty, the little cat stirred, stretched and chirped, butting his head against Jack’s. His cheerful purr reverberated through Jack’s chest.

 

Sneezing again, Jack scooped Bitty up and marched through to Shitty’s room. He rapped on the door and opened it without waiting for a response.

 

“I told you if you were going to get a cat you had to keep it out of my room.” He dumped Bitty on Shitty’s bed and left.

 

Shitty feebly stirred, looked at the cat currently kneading his pillow and frowned. “I thought you were in here last night? Must’ve left the door open. Sorry Jack,” he called after the retreating figure.

 

(^..^)/

 

They trouped back into the Haus, tired, but victorious in their away games.

 

Shitty had called Camilla at least seven times to check in on Bitty.

 

“What the hell happened here?” asked Holster, as he put his bags down in the hall.

 

The living room was immaculate.

 

Except for the couch.

 

Rans called from the kitchen, “Guys, you won't believe this. The kitchen is, well it’s, it’s clean.”

 

The kitchen gleamed. Every surface had been scoured, and the floor mopped.

 

“Hey! Is that pie?” Holster practically shoved Rans out of the way. A warm fresh pecan pie sat on the table along with forks and plates. Holster dug his fingers in. A sharp meow and a hiss came from under the table.

 

“Ow! Son of a bitch. Bitty bit me!”

 

“Dude! Don't be a heathen. Cut the pie. And share.”

 

Camilla denied all knowledge and said it had been like that when she came over to check on Bitty.

 

(^..^)/

 

The Haus managed to stay relatively clean, except for the cat hair. It covered every available surface, held quiet meetings in the corners, enough to knit another cat or two. The only thing that didn’t appear to be a magnet for cat hair was the couch. Bitty wouldn’t go anywhere near it, not even to scratch it.

 

(^..^)/

 

Bitty would snuggle up to any and all of the Haus residents, especially when stress-levels hit all-time highs. He never left Rans’s side during midterms.

 

When not engaged in comforting, he aggressively stalked Jack, pouncing at his toes in the morning, climbing on his lap anytime he sat down, sitting under his chair at supper.

 

“You know cats are assholes, Jackie-boy. They always want the one person who hates them.”

 

(^..^)/

 

Bitty strolled across the kitchen counter, sat down near the sink, tail curled around his paws and stared in disgust at the pile of dirty dishes. He mrrowed at Rans and Holster sitting at the table.

 

“Yeah, I know it’s my turn to wash. I’ll get right on it,” said Rans, who closed his books and stood up.

 

Jack, standing at the fridge to get a protein shake, said, “Did you just tell the cat you’re going to wash the dishes?”

 

Rans shrugged. “Yeah, well, they need doing, and it’s my turn, so I guess?”

 

Jack looked at Rans, looked at the cat, looked back at Rans and left the kitchen, shaking his head.

 

(^..^)/

 

No one figured out who kept sneaking pies into the Haus whenever they were away. Shitty said it must be someone who admired his mustache.

 

One night when Holster happened to have had a few too many Natty Lights postulated the theory that Bitty was responsible.

 

Bitty declined to comment. He blinked sleepily at Holster and smiled his secret cat smile.

 

(^..^)/

 

Jack opened his hockey bag.

 

“Oh for fuck’s sake.”

 

A small ginger head popped out, and a small ginger body wound itself around Jack’s ankles.

 

Shitty chuckled. “Bitty seems to really like your bag, brah.” He inhaled. “Can’t say I blame him. That ripe manly stench coming outta there. Mmmm, pheromones.”

 

“He can’t stay here, and I don't have time to take him back!”

 

“Jeez, Jack. He’ll be fine,” said Holster. “We’ll shut him in Hall’s office and bring him back to the Haus after the game. Relax.”

 

Somehow Bitty snuck out of the office, made his way out to the rink and sat with the team during the game.

 

They won 4-0.

 

And that’s how Bitty came to be at all of the home games.

 

Hall and Murray never seemed to notice.

 

(^..^)/

 

“Shitty! Crisse,” Jack sneezed, biting his tongue.

 

The little cat had snuck into his room. Again. Jack came in to find him snuggled up on his pillow. He rolled over on his back and showed his soft belly of white fur. Jack could hear his purr from the door.

 

He picked up the cat and took him downstairs where Shitty and Holster were playing Mario Cart. He put the cat on Shitty’s lap, glared at both of them and stomped up to his room.

 

Settled in with his history textbook, he made notes and muttered about American Revolutionary sea battles. About a half an hour into his studies a strange noise caught his ear, sort of like sandpaper. He ignored it and continued studying. It got louder. Opening the door, he found the cat sitting behind it, his little face turned up to Jack. He meowed and strolled in. Jack hung his head.

 

“Okay, but stay off of my pillow.” He shut the door and sat down at his desk. The cat wandered his room, sniffing here and there, rubbing his face on all of Jack’s belongings and finally settled at his feet. Jack forgot after a while the cat was there. He stood to grab some dinner, noticing the cat had fallen asleep. He had no idea his face wore a soft smile as he stared at the little cat.

 

“Okay, cat. I guess you can stay. I’ll bring you up some supper, eh?”

 

(^..^)/

 

Bitty managed to disappear anytime anyone mentioned neutering.

 

(^..^)/

 

Jack sat on his bed, head in hands.

 

His father had left an hour ago.

 

And it had been fine.

 

For the most part.

 

Except he hadn't been the one to get the goal and now all he could do was replay the game over and over in his head.

 

He ignored the soft rasp of paws at his door, crawled into bed and put the pillow over his head to block out the sound of Bittle meowing.

 

(^..^)/

 

“Dude, I need to paint this cat.”

 

“I know, right?”

 

“So Zimmermann accepted that Bitty is staying yet?”

 

“Nope. He is in complete denial. But Lards, this cat fucking loves him. It is a match made in heaven.”

 

“Cool.”

 

(^..^)/

 

“So this is Faber.”

 

“Faber’s cooler than I imagined! Can’t you picture it? Being at center ice face off with the big windows in the back?!”

 

“I mean, I guess it’s all right, but I’m still, uh, leaning towards a state school, or somewhere less…preppy. And what the hell? Is that a cat?”

 

“Chyeah! Didn't you know Samwell has a real-life mascot? Like, not just a guy in a Wellies suit, which they also have. They have a cat! I saw it on Twitter. They say it’s good luck!”

 

“For crying out loud!”

 

“I think it’s ‘swasome.”

 

(^..^)/

 

Jack put his hockey bag on the hotel bed.

 

“Goddammit!”

 

A small ginger head popped out, and a small ginger body stretched and made himself at home on Jack’s bed.

 

Shitty laughed so hard he fell off of his bed.

 

They won 5-2.

 

And that’s how Bitty came to be at all of the away games.

 

But in a proper carrier.

 

Hall, Murray and the hotel staff never seemed to notice.

 

(^..^)/

 

Shitty posted a video to the group chat of Jack sitting on the couch studying. His legs were stretched out and Bitty curled up on top of them, making sure not one inch of his body touched the couch. Bitty’s head lay on his paws and there were little cat snores coming from him. Jack sat deep in concentration, occasionally reaching out to scratch Bitty’s head.

 

(^..^)/

 

“So,” Jack asked nonchalantly, “What are we going to do with the cat over the summer?”

 

Shitty put down his textbook.

 

“It looks like Johnson’s staying here to, I don't know, move the plot forward.”

 

“What?”

 

“So yeah, I asked around and Johnson said, and I quote, ‘In this universe I need to stay over the summer and watch Bitty in order to move the plot forward. Then in the fall I will go and wander the Appalachian Trail and find myself. Supposedly.’”

 

“He said that?”

 

“Chyeah.”

 

“What even is Johnson?”

 

“I don't know, bro. I don't know.”

 

(^..^)/

 

Shitty stood by the door and hugged Jack. “Make sure you Skype as soon as you get to Montreal.”

 

“I will.” He hugged Shitty back and then bent down to pet Bitty. “You take care of Johnson now, you hear? I’ll see you in the fall.” Melancholy filled him. There could be a chance he might miss the cat.

 

Johnson grinned that mysterious grin of his and said, “Since this isn’t real, I’m sure we’ll be fine.”

 

Bitty rubbed his face on Jack’s finger and tried to snag it with his paw. He meowed long and loud and then chirped. It seemed almost comical in its intensity.

 

Almost.

 

“Ah, Brah, he doesn't want you to go!”

 

“A little difficult to bring him to two hockey camps and through customs.”

 

“Bye Jacky.”

 

“Bye Shits. Bye Johnson. Bye Bitty.”

 

 

(^..^)/

 

Jack unloaded his boxes. Shitty came running out of The Haus and hugged him. “I have missed you so fucking much! Howdy Mrs. Zimmermann!” He hugged her too, and she patted him on the back, laughing.

 

“How are you Shitty? Please tell me that cat is still here. He’s all Jack’s talked about.”

 

“What’s this Jack-a-bell? Mr. ‘No-Cats-Allowed’ Zimmermann, you missed Bitty? Did he get under your skin with his cute little kitty cat ways?”

 

“Shut up, Shits. I, euh, I just got used to him. That's all.”

 

“Well, who am I to separate two star-crossed lovers. He’s upstairs, probably on your bed. Hey!” He held up his hands at the dirty look Jack threw him. “At least your sheets aren’t on it.” Shitty laughed some more and helped Alicia unpack the truck.

 

Jack took his suitcase and a box into the Haus and climbed the stairs to the second floor. Sure enough, the door to his bedroom was open. He walked in and the box and suitcase fell out of his hands. He didn’t think too much about whether it held anything breakable.

 

He didn't think about anything much at all, standing there, distracted by the small gingery blonde man sleeping on his bed.

 

Naked.

 

And despite the fact that the young man, gorgeous, muscular and lean, pretty much Jack’s type in a lot of meaningful ways, the pointed ears and tail was a bit of a surprise.


	2. This Kit be a Catastrophe

Jack’s mouth fell open. He rubbed his eyes.

 

He rubbed his eyes because that’s the go-to response when something doesn't add up or naked cat men lie on the bed.

 

He opened them again. Thank God.

 

A cat. Not a naked man.

 

Because a naked man on his bed, that wouldn't happen. He didn't know any naked men.

 

Not that he didn’t want to know any naked men.

 

Just maybe not cat men.

 

Or did he?

 

Except for Shitty. Shitty liked to be naked. But he wasn’t attracted to Shitty.

Shitty was a friend.

 

“M’Dude! You okay? You’re staring at Bits like he’s got two heads.”

 

Jack jumped about two feet. “Oh yeah. Fine, just, hey cat. Get off of my bed.” Good recovery.

 

Bitty blinked slowly, stretched again and jumped down. With a wink.

Cats wink, right? That’s not weird.

 

(^..^)/

 

The summer faded out, and classes started.

 

Jack, deciding to be more adventurous in his final year, took a history course on Women, Food, and Culture.

 

His first day in class a young man sat beside him.

 

He seemed familiar somehow.

 

Not from hockey.

 

Not from another class.

 

Hmmm.

 

And the light bulb goes off.

 

He looks a little bit like naked Bitty.

 

Or the Bitty who didn't exist but in a moment of heatstroke or something he thought had been real.

 

Fiddling with his notebook, Jack doodled hockey plays, maybe a cat. Hoping to figure out…something.

 

How did his brain picture this complete stranger naked on his bed but with ears and a tail? Had he seen him on campus and his fevered brain substituted the cat for the young man sitting here?

 

The young man chatted with the woman sitting beside him. Hmmm, he had an accent.

 

The accent did something to the wiring in his brain.

 

At the same time, it calmed him, and it made his libido sit up and take notice.

 

Crisse.

 

That hadn't happened for a long time.

 

“Hey! You’re Jack Zimmermann?” said not-naked Bitty.

 

“Euh, yeah, I guess.”

 

“You guess? Hun, are you feeling okay?”

 

“Yeah, yeah, fine, just, um, thinking.”

 

“I can tell you’re thinking about hockey.” He nudged Jack with his shoulder. Jack didn’t mind the invasion of personal space. At all. It felt nice. “I’m Eric. Eric Bittle.”

 

“What?”

 

“Eric Bittle. I’ve seen some of your games. I don't know a whole lot about hockey, but I sure do like watching y’all chase that puck. The way it scoots around. How do you move so fast?”

 

“Um, practice?”

 

Eric laughed and patted his hand. “You’re cute.”

 

Professor Atley entered the class, and Jack decided he should listen.

 

At least he tried. He kept thinking about Eric Bittle. How much he looked like the young man on the bed. Just a coincidence Bittle sounded like Bitty.

 

He zoned out while Atley broke down the marks for the semester.

 

At the end of the class, everyone else stood to leave, but he sat, staring off into space.

 

“Jack, are you okay?” Eric patted his hand again. “Can I get you anything? You seem a little lost.”

 

“No, no, I’m okay. Just tired I guess.”

 

“Do you need some water or coffee or something? We could go to Annie’s. My treat. And I could fill you in on the class you just sat through.” Eric bit his lip and mischief danced in his eyes.

 

Jack nodded. Yeah. Coffee. He needed coffee.

 

Eric led the way.

 

(^..^)/

 

They sat in Annie’s, Jack with a black coffee, no sugar. Eric with a Pumpkin Spiced sugary confection with extra whipped cream and chocolate shavings and who the hell knew what swimming in it. Jack would not call it coffee.

 

He didn't let himself do this sort of thing often. Sit in a coffee shop, drinking coffee, a stranger’s magical accent washing over him. He had no idea what Eric was saying, but there was something very relaxing about listening and no expectations to contribute.

 

Jack turned his mug around and around staring at Eric, noticing the way the sun came in through the shop window and bounced off the gold in his hair. His eyes tracked Eric’s tongue as he carefully licked the whipped cream off of his lips. He watched Eric’s hands as they traced through the air, punctuating his speech with graceful movements.

 

“Oh my goodness! I am so sorry. I have totally monopolized the conversation. My mama would smack me for being so rude.” Eric blushed, and Jack wondered how far down that blush went.

 

 

“Um, no, it’s okay. I, euh, I don't mind.”

 

Eric shook his head and started talking about their class rather than whatever he’d just been going on about.

 

“So, I know you weren’t really listening. The final project is worth forty percent. We have to research an old recipe, write about it and bake it. I wondered if you would like some help. I am a pretty good cook slash baker, and I have a feeling you’re a good student.” He winked. “I am not. I get so easily distracted by, well, lots of things. So what do you think?”

 

“You help me, and I help you? Sure. That would work.” Jack thought about how nice it would be to see Eric outside of class. “I live in a house, well if you can call it that,” he laughed. “We could use the oven there.”

 

“That’s great! Oh! Do you think I could use the oven other times? To bake stuff? I love to bake and it’s hard to find access to a proper stove.”

 

“Yeah, probably. I’ll ask the guys but I’m sure they won’t mind.”

 

“Hun, I will pay you in baking.”

 

Jack laughed again. How easily it came sitting with Eric. “I’m sure they’ll say yes.”

 

(^..^)/

 

Eric settled into Jack’s routine effortlessly, like breathing. He didn't even know how he’d not had Eric around him all his life.

 

They’d bake together with a dash of studying thrown in, and Jack found he spent more time in the kitchen listening to Eric’s chatter or watching him dancing and singing to music he’d never paid attention to before.

 

Deep contentment settled into his chest and he felt relaxed and calm.

 

The first time Jack invited Eric over, he warned him about Bitty. “Do you like cats?”

 

“I love cats! Only, well…”

 

“What?”

 

“They don't always like me. Cats often hiss and run away from me.” Eric looked sad. Jack didn't want Eric to look that way ever again.

 

“There’s a cat who lives at the Haus. His name is Bitty.”

 

“Oh, that’s funny! Bittle, Bitty. Is he small and blonde?”

 

“Ginger actually.”

 

Eric laughed again, sunshine on snow.

 

“He, um, he has a bit of an attitude with new people and, um, he can be possessive.”

 

“So be careful and watch myself around him, is that what you’re saying? Will he be jealous of me?” Jack could tell Eric liked to tease.

 

“I just wanted to make sure you weren’t allergic or anything.”

 

“No, not allergic.”

 

Jack showed him in. Eric danced with excitement at being able to cook in a real kitchen. After checking with Jack, he started cleaning the counters and looked through the cupboards for ingredients. He shouted overtop of the music coming from his phone while Jack added to a list, items they would need.

 

Returning from Murder Stop-And-Shop, Eric made a huge casserole for the Haus residents and two kinds of pie, apple and blueberry.

 

Everyone dug in and it was probably one of the nicest evenings Jack had had in a long time. He even had a piece of pie.

 

Eric washed while Jack dried and they discussed the project for Professor Atley’s class. Jack saw Eric to the door, with the promise of getting together not the next day, because he had a game, but the day after.

 

He watched Eric walk down the sidewalk and disappear into the dark.

 

Later, when he went upstairs to bed, he found Bitty curled up on it.

 

Funny. He didn't remember leaving the window open.

 

(^..^)/

 

Eric stopped by a couple of times a week.

 

Bitty wouldn’t come out from wherever he hid while Eric stayed in the Haus.

 

Eric seemed fairly philosophical about it.

 

(^..^)/

 

Bitty continued to attend hockey games.

 

The Wellies continued to win.

 

(^..^)/

 

Sometimes Eric would meet them after games, but not usually at the arena. He’d always meet them back at the Haus.

 

(^..^)/

 

Jack missed Eric whenever they were on the road, but they decide not to chat too much on the phone because Eric said it was the only time he’d not get distracted from studying.

 

Jack could respect that.

 

But he really missed Eric.

 

Fortunately Bitty slept with him, curled into his side almost every night.

 

(^..^)/

 

Eric liked to nap. Sometimes Jack would sit on his bed with his books while Eric lay beside him, curled up. He would smile down at Eric, brush the hair out of his eyes.

 

Best feeling ever.

 

(^..^)/

 

Jack kissed Eric the first time after they handed in their projects. He’d invited him back to the Haus. Eric refused to sit on ‘that upholstered cesspool you call a couch.’ Jack patted his lap. Eric blushed but climbed on.

 

The kisses were slow and sweet at first, with pauses in between to look longingly into each other’s eyes. Jack held Eric, his big hands spanning his back, holding him treasured and sure.

 

Eric kissed him on the nose and tucked his head under Jack’s chin.

 

“I think this is my favorite place to be.”

 

“In the whole world?”

 

“In the whole world.”

 

Eric left shortly after, saying he didn't want to rush what they had.

 

“There are probably things we should talk about too, first, if that’s okay?” Eric’s eyes, big and brown, watched Jack’s, looking almost wistful.

 

“Yeah, of course.” He kissed Eric again and shut the door.

 

He sat on the couch, feeling content and happy. A few minutes later, Bitty came out of the kitchen and climbed up on Jack’s lap, purring.

 

Jack absentmindedly scratched Bitty’s head, thinking about Eric.

 

Bitty purred louder.

 

(^..^)/

 

Jack stopped sneezing around Bitty.

 

(^..^)/

 

A couple of times Eric looked like he wanted to tell Jack something, but when he asked, Eric would smile, shake his head, looking sadly out the window.

 

Jack knew he had to be patient.

 

(^..^)/

 

The hockey team loved Eric.

 

And not just for his pies.

 

One night, Shitty, who’d been out with Lardo on the back porch smoking weed, teared up and said, “You make my Jack so happy. I love you man.”

 

(^..^)/

 

One time Bitty didn't come to the home game. They looked everywhere for him but they’d be late if they kept at it.

 

“We have to have Bitty! What if…”

 

“Don't say it Chowder! We are not going to. We’ll just have to bring a photo of him.”

 

When they came out to warm up, Jack saw Eric was sitting behind their bench. He waved. Eric waved back.

 

They won 3-1.

 

They made sure Eric sat behind their bench every home game after that.

 

Bitty stayed behind for the home games from now on.

 

“Probably a good thing,” said Dex. “One of these times the coaches were going to notice and then what would we do.”

 

“You really need to chill.”

 

Bitty still went with them on away games.

 

(^..^)/

 

Epikegster came.

 

Eric hung out with Jack. Parse showed up.

 

Jack’s hands shook.

 

Eric bristled and stood in front of Jack. He politely asked Parse to leave.

 

“Did, did you just hiss at me?” Parse asked.

 

“Possibly. And there’s more coming if you don't leave now.”

 

“Jack?” Parse asked.

 

He shook his head slowly and Eric grabbed Parse’s arm and ‘politely’ escorted him to the door.

 

“Okay, okay. I’m going. Man! Your nails are sharp.”

 

Jack looked relieved and sad at the same time. Eric kissed his cheek.

 

“You okay, sweetpea?”

 

“Yeah. I mean, Parse and I owe each other a lot of apologies but maybe now is not the time, eh?”

 

(^..^)/

 

Eric undressed slowly in front of Jack.

 

He stared at Jack the whole time as he slowly popped each button on his shirt and shimmied out of his jeans.

 

Jack swallowed, and almost moaned aloud to see Eric’s trousers tented.

 

He moved forward to bring him closer, couldn't keep away.

 

Eric grinned a Cheshire cat grin. “No, no Mr. Zimmermann. You just sit there and watch, like a good boy.”

 

Jack nodded, tried to be a good boy for Eric, watched him, his mouth open, his libido…lididoing. Something deep inside Jack, and something not so deep, stirred. The movement of Eric’s muscle and skin, stretching so gracefully, in such a languid way, certainly one of the most beautiful things Jack had ever seen. He wished he had his camera in hand to capture it.

 

Throwing his underwear to the floor, Eric climbed up on the end of Jack’s bed and crawled slowly, slowly, up to him, stalking, pounced, eyes never leaving his face.

 

“Are you ready for me, Jack?” Eric breathed into Jack’s mouth, his hand brushed against Jack’s full, hard cock. Jack put his hand on Eric’s arm and pulled him closer, his other hand on the back of his head.

 

And he kissed him. Hard, Jack’s tongue flicking into Eric’s mouth, sucking.

 

Growling a little, Eric swung his legs on either side of Jack’s, rocking and thrusting. They both breathed heavily.

 

“Underpants, Jack. Off. Now.”

 

He sat up on his knees while Jack took off his underpants. He sat back down again and hissed, warm flesh touching warm flesh, hot, molten.

 

Putting his hands on Eric’s hips, he pulled him closer, rocking against him. He moved his hand down and carefully, slowly, touched Eric’s cock.

 

“Is this okay?”

 

“Oh God, yes. Please Jack, please.”

 

“What do you want?”

 

“Anything, Everything. You. I want you.”

 

He gasped Eric’s cock, stroking slowly, kissing, kissing, kissing and wrapped his hand around both of them, their cocks together, hot and overwhelming. He stoked them together, panting into Eric’s mouth. Stroking up and down.

 

Eric looked down to watch, his eyes big and dark. He put his head on Jack’s shoulder.

 

“God, Jack, this is so hot. God, I’m so close.” He mouthed at jack’s shoulder, lips teeth, biting down a little. Eric made a sound almost inhuman. He yowled through his teeth, biting harder and came, shuddering all over Jack’s hand. He sat back a bit, tired, but continued to watch as Jack stroked himself harder until he came. Eric leaned forward, against Jack’s forehead, eyes closed. He fumbled for Jack’s mouth, kissing him. Jack touched his face. It was wet with tears.

 

“Eric, Eric I love you,” he whispered. “I love you so much.”

 

“Jack, Jack, I love you.”

 

He reached down and grabbed Jack’s t-shirt, wiping them both up carefully, too tired to do anything else. They snuggled down together, Eric yawning wide, showing his teeth.

 

Jack pulled the covers over them both and fell asleep stroking Eric’s back, warm and soft.

 

He fell asleep listening to Eric purr.

 

(^..^)/

 

Sometime in the night, he rolled over onto his side. Eric shifted with him, so Jack spooned him, Eric’s tail between his legs.

 

It didn't even feel weird.

 

(^..^)/

 

Stirring, Jack started to wake up.

 

He had slept long and deeply. Best sleep he’d had in a long time. Sex with Eric, snuggling afterward with Eric, being with Eric, left him feeling so incredibly happy.

 

A heavy weight settled on his chest. He lifted a hand and found Bitty there. He still had his eyes closed, while he stroked through Bitty’s fur. He reached out a hand to Eric, who should be sleeping beside him.

 

No one there.

 

Jack’s eyes flew open.

 

He turned his head.

 

Eric wasn’t there.

 

Bitty woke with a mrrupp, stretched and butted Jack’s nose with his own.

 

Jack sat up, moving Bitty out of the way.

 

Bitty meowed and brushed against Jack.

 

Jack felt deep disappointment. Eric had disappeared in the night.

 

Maybe he had to be somewhere today? But wouldn't he have said?

 

Then he noticed Eric’s clothes on the floor.

 

Oh.

 

He must be in the bathroom or something.

 

“Eric?” he called out, trying not to be too loud, not wanting to wake up the others in the Haus.

 

“Merow.”

 

“Not now Bitty. Eric?”

 

“Meow.”

 

“Eric are you in the bathroom?”

 

“Meeeeerroow, row meow, purt.”

 

Jack looked at Bitty. Bitty sat on his haunches and stared back.

 

Jack looked at the bathroom door. It sounded pretty quiet in there.

 

He looked back at Bitty.

 

Bitty winked.

 

“Oh. My. God.” Jack whispered. He sat back, eyes closed, head slowly banging on the wall.

 

Bitty climbed on his lap, placed his paws on his shoulders and kissed Jack’s nose.

 

Jack’s eyes opened. “Eric?”

 

Bitty sat back, flicked his eyes to the side, seemed to shrug and said, “Meow.”


	3. Pawsitive Catmewnication

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And here is the last chapter with suitable happy ending. Lots of fluff - cat fluff.  
> Thank you so very much for all of the wonderful comments. I am so delighted by the response to this fic.  
> Thank you to mattsloved1 for looking it over and shooting some great ideas my way!!

Bitty kept purring and butting Jack. He automatically stroked him, running his hand down his back and scratching his ears. 

“My boyfriend is a cat,” he said to the air.

“Merow.”

“My cat is my boyfriend.”

“Mrrow.”

“But how? Bitty? Eric? Baric? What the hell?”

Bitty curled up on Jack’s lap and started to snooze.

Jack poked at him. “Hey! You don't get to sleep. We need to talk.”

Bitty opened one eye and grumbled a bit.

Maybe he couldn't talk right now.

Maybe he could only be human once in a while.

Maybe… 

“My boyfriend is a cat.”

(^..^)/

Jack got dressed. Leaving Bitty asleep on the bed, he went for a run to clear his head and try to think without the warm body of his boyfriend purring and snoring beside him.

Now there’s a thought he never thought he’d think.

Running helped. He could think about the situation and didn't have to concentrate too much about where he went as long as he watched for traffic and cyclists and small children.

His boyfriend was a cat.

Okay.

Is that bad? Did it mean he didn't love him?

Weird in the vein of alien abduction but not bad per se. At least it wasn’t ‘I dated a Yeti!’ although perhaps if Eric were a Yeti, he’d date him. It wasn’t the package as what was inside. He’d known Bitty for almost two years, and he’d known Eric for most of one. Personality wise, they both had similarities, and he found them endearing, all of them, even the annoying ones. Both of them gave him great joy even if at first he hadn’t liked Bitty that much.

He also knew Bitty loved him, and so did Eric.

And…he loved them. He’d said it last night and he meant it.

He loved them.

He stopped, panting a little, so lost in thought he hadn't realized how far he’d come.

He turned to head back.

He loved Bitty but more importantly, he loved Eric.

It shouldn't matter after that.

He nodded to himself and ran back to the Haus.

(^..^)

Entering his room, he noticed the change right away. Eric slept under the covers, a small tuft of gingery blonde hair sticking out.

Jack stripped down quickly and efficiently, pulled the covers back and snuggled up to Eric pulling him close.

“You’re cold,” Eric muttered sleepily.

“You’re a cat.”

“Yeah, I am.” Eric squinted at Jack, bleary-eyed. “Are you mad?”

“No. Confused, but not mad. I kinda wished you’d told me.”

Eric sighed. “I tried, but how do I start that sentence? ‘Hey Jack, you know that cat that’s been living with you? Yeah, that's me.’ I thought, maybe it would be easier to show you.”

Jack rested his chin on Eric’s head. “I can see that. Do you want to talk about it?”

“Mmmm,” Eric kissed Jack’s chest. “Maybe after breakfast. We could go to Jerry’s and maybe walk around?” He laid his head on Jack’s chest, his hand flexing a little, nails pricking the skin but not hurting. Jack didn't mind. “I’m so sorry, Jack. You’re taking this really well.”

Jack cleared his throat. “I am having a mild panic attack inside but honestly? I should have realized a long time ago. Sometimes I am oblivious.”

“No? Really?” 

Jack laughed and rolled over on top of Eric. “You are a sassy one.” And kissed him. He moved his hips slightly, rutting against Eric.

“Mr. Zimmermann, it is a pleasure to see you this morning.”

“Can I say I am rather glad your penis isn't barbed?”

Eric blushed. It did go all the way down and suited Eric. “Well, um, not when I’m human.” He giggled a little and blushed more.

“Hmm, maybe I’d better take a closer look.” He scooted down under the covers and proceeded to inspect Eric’s cock most meticulously. 

Eric, of course, reciprocated, even though there was little chance of Jack’s penis being barbed. 

They showered together because as Eric said, “We’re grosser than the underside of that couch and I know what’s under there.” He made sure they were completely clean. 

“You know for a cat, you sure like long showers,” Jack said while examining his pruney fingers.

Eric smiled a smug smile and kissed Jack. “Keep that up mister and we might not get breakfast.”

(^..^)/

They walked around campus for a bit, ended up at Jerry’s. Found a quiet booth in the corner. They ordered an impressive breakfast.

Jack played with his juice glass. “So, have you always been a cat?”

“Um, yes and no. I mean, I have parents and we’re more or less human, but sometime around our eighteenth birthday, a change takes place. We become cats and then we are sent out into the world to find out who we really are and,” he blushed. Jack now knew that the blush did travel all the way down. “Find our true love.” He looked up, a soft smile gracing his face. “At least that’s how I feel.”

Jack smiled; he couldn’t stop looking at Eric who made his heart thud a little bit harder, cleared his head and calmed him. He took his hand, threading their fingers together. “That’s how I feel, too. I can’t imagine being with anyone else.”

They chatted a bit about how it had been Eric making pies and cleaning the Haus last year. He’d been able to change a few times a week after living with Jack and Shitty. 

“So how about clothes and school?”

“Johnson helped me.”

“Johnson?”

“Yeah. He came to me one night said he knew I was a cat because even though the writer hadn't figured out the ending yet, he knew the whole story. He helped me contact my parents, bought me some clothes with money they sent and then helped me enroll in school.” Eric shrugged. “I keep some changes of clothes in the basement in a knapsack behind the furnace.”

“Huh. Figures.”

Their breakfast arrived and they sat eating for a few minutes.

“Do you want to tell anyone else about this? Can you tell anyone else about this?”

Eric nodded a bit. “Yeah, I can tell trustworthy people. I think Shitty, Lardo, Rans, and Holster. Maybe Chowder, Dex and Nursey, too, eventually.” He shrugged. “After that, well, we’ll see. I think you’d be surprised how many of us are out there.”

“Really?”

“Really. More than you’d think.”

(^..^)/

They talked to Shitty and Lardo that afternoon. Shitty bawled when he heard the whole story. “Shut up,” he said, wiping his eyes. “You two are so in love. And I helped! I helped!” He collapsed on Jack’s shoulder and Jack patted him uncertainly.

“Cool,” Lardo said. “Interested in playing beer pong as a cat? I bet you could learn to whack that ball. We could clean up.”

It also led to an interesting final project for her where she painted a series of Eric slash Bitty inspired pictures of humans and cats morphing into one another.

She got an A.

(^..^)/

They told Rans and Holster. 

Holster felt a little sad that he wouldn’t see Bitty anymore. “I mean I know he bit me a couple of times, but I loved that little dude.”

Eric rolled his eyes and there was a little shimmer in the air and Bitty sat meowing in a pile of clothes. 

Rans refused to believe it up until that moment convinced Jack and Eric were pulling his leg. He stood with his mouth open and whispered. “Bitty’s a cat, I mean, Eric’s a Bitty.”

Eric changed back and got him some ice tea and a cold washcloth.

(^..^)/

Things pretty much settled into a normal routine after.

But Jack took note of things that made him smile.

(^..^)/

Once when Holster was bored and being Holster, used a penlight and flicked it at the wall. Eric, who honestly just wanted to study, began to quiver all over, his butt wiggled and his pupils grew so big.

And he’d pounce, smacking into the wall.

Eric revoked Holster’s pie privileges for a month. 

(^..^)/

Alicia and Bad Bob were delighted to meet Eric. They were so happy that Jack was happy they didn’t care one bit he spent a few hours a day as a cat.

Jack explained to Bob that no, Eric would not help with the mouse problem in the garage.

(^..^)/

During a home game, the movement of the puck got so intense, and Eric got so excited, Lardo whispered in his ear. “Your tail just popped out. Tuck it in.”

Embarrassed, Eric sat with his hands underneath his butt for the rest of the game.

Fortunately, no one noticed.

(^..^)/

On game days, Jack liked to snuggle down on the bed with Eric and nap.

(^..^)/

They tried sex with Eric keeping his tail and ears.

That particular kink came as a delightful surprise to Jack.

When Eric came his tail lashed and he’d growl deep in his throat. He bit Jack hard. Jack saw stars and lost the ability to speak for about twenty minutes.

“I don't know if I’m going to survive you, Eric Bittle.” Jack stroked Eric’s back while Eric very prettily licked him all over, purring.

Jack’s refractory period rolled over pretty quick with that kind of attention. 

(^..^)/

After graduation, Jack and Eric moved in together in a lovely apartment in Providence. Eric continued to go to school and stayed at the Haus during the week. Eric didn't play hockey but he’d been such a big part of the team’s life they made him an honorary member and he attended all the home games.

He didn't go away with them anymore. 

(^..^)/

After some soul-searching and a lot of talking about it, Eric brought Jack home to meet his parents. They were a little dubious that their son wanted to live with a man and a non-feline but they took to Jack eventually.

“Pretty sure they love you more than me,” Eric grumbled but without any sting. 

“That’s okay. You have my parents wrapped around your finger. Did I tell you they want us to go with them to Bermuda?”

(^..^)/

Eric climbed onto Jack’s lap, hugging him close. 

“I guess it hit me. This is it. It’s the cup.” 

“Should I get off you? You can breathe between…”

“No! I. It’s not…I should be fine if…just wait a sec. I’m usually alone. This helps.”

Eric pulled him closer. He made a noise in his throat and ran his hands through Jack’s hair, which seemed to help. He didn't turn into a cat though because some things are better faced as a human. 

(^..^)/

Wrapping paper covered the floor. 

“We all chipped in,” said Holster.

“We thought you’d like it. And, and maybe Jack too,” said Chowder, trying to hide his grin.

“I did not contribute to this gift,” said Lardo. “My present’s coming later.”

Eric opened the box, and laughed, blushing a bit. “I was afraid this might be from that questionable shop in Boston. This is almost as bad.”

Inside were some lovely claw clippers, a bristle brush, and a collar with a bell.

“We thought, you, know, it could be fun, for you know…”

“I think he gets it, Dex, chill.”

“Besides we thought the bell on the collar could stop you from sneaking up on us all the time.

“I only did that twice.”

Later Lardo handed him a packet. “Shitty and I thought you’d like to try this sometime.”

“Lardo, you know we don't smoke…”

“It’s catnip.”

“Oh! Oh, my.”

(^..^)/

They got married on the beach at sunset, barefoot and bareheaded, the sunset glowing on the two of them. 

Jack had never been happier. Eric couldn't stop smiling.

Although later he grumbled a bit about the sand between his toes.

(^..^)/

After Jack retired, they set up a fund for cats like Bitty, helping them make their way in the world and find their soul mates.

(^..^)/

They bought a house in Providence and a cabin in northern Quebec. They decided they would adopt two children. Eric said he’d like to look for a child like him if that would be okay. 

Jack smiled and kissed his head. “Of course. I wouldn’t have it any other way.”

(^..^)/

“Did I tell you today that I love you?” Eric said, snuggled up against Jack’s leg. 

Jack turned his book over and pulled Eric toward him. “No, I don't think you did. You’d better remind me.”

“I love you, Jack.”

“I love you, Eric. I am so glad Shitty talked me into getting a cat that day.”

“Me too.” 

And they loved happily ever after.


End file.
